The tranny child: "What is up with this gender essentialist crap?"

The revolutionary child: "Why are we wasting time with all of this religious stuff? Religion is the opiate of the masses. Why on this night are we not smashing the state?"

The gentile child: "What page are we on?"

The eco-feminist, crusty, punk-rock vegan child: "Was this haggadah printed in a union shop on 100 percent, post-consumer, recycled, hemp paper, using soy ink that was not tested on animals?"


haggadah Section: -- Four Children