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The Four Children
Contributed by Jeffrey Rothman

  • TOP HAGGADAHS FOR 2023

The Four Children - אַרְבָּעָה בָנִים

The four children have been said to represent many things such as four different kinds of personalities or the four stages of life. The four children also represent the importance of being together as a family and as a community. Members within our family and community are as different from one another as are the four children. We can acknowledge our differences but we can only maintain our strength and enjoy our freedom from slavery if we remain united. Just as the Haggadah highlights their differences but still places the four children together at the same table, may we embrace diversity in our own families and groups and enjoy the warm embrace of unity this Passover Season.

The Wise Child says: I want to know the meaning of all these rules.

This child is proud to be a Jew and is interested in sharing experiences that are important to Jews. We answer this child by teaching the child the rules of Passover, the meaning and the experiences of the Jewish people.

 

The Wicked Child says: Why do you bother with all these rules?

This child has not learned to include himself or herself in this question, and acts like he is not a member of the Jewish people. We answer this child by saying: Had you been in Egypt at the time of the Exodus, you would not have been included when God freed our ancestors from slavery. 

The Simple Child says: What is this all about?

This child needs to understand why we are sitting here. We answer this child by saying, “We do all these things because God helped us out of Egypt and freed us from slavery.

The Child Who Does Not Know Enough to Ask, we explain that Passover reminds us of what God did for us when we left Egypt.” We try to teach this child more about what it means to be a Jew.

THE FIFTH CHILD……THE ONE WHO CANNOT ASK

On this night, we remember a fifth child. This is a child of the Shoah (Holocaust), who did not survive to ask. Therefore, we ask for that child Why?

We are like the simple child. We have no answer.

We can only follow the footsteps of Rabbi Elazar ben Azariah, who could not bring himself to mention the Exodus at night until Ben Zoma explained it to him through the verse: In order that you REMEMBER the day of your going out from Egypt, all the days of your life. (Deut. 16.3) We answer that child’s question with silence. In silence, we remember that dark time. In silence, we remember that Jews preserved their image of God in the struggle for life. In silence, we remember the Seder nights spent in the forests, ghettos, and camps; we remember that Seder night when the Warsaw Ghetto rose in revolt.
haggadah Section: -- Four Children

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