How the Virus Stole Pesach (with fond acknowledgement to Doctor Seuss)
All the Jews down in Jewville loved Pesach a lot
With charoses served cold and horseradish hot.
They kept up traditions at family seders
The way they had learned from their bubbies and zeides.
They invited their neighbors and uncles and cousins
And gathered at tables by tens and by dozens.
They drank brandy and wine and did without beer
And the last drink was for Jerusalem next year.
But the in the year fifty seven and eighty
There came a disaster ominous and weighty.
There appeared from the east a plague called corona
And each Jew down in Jewville was told “Be a loner!”
Separate!  Stay inside! Avoid meeting and greeting!
There will be no more banquets or festival seating!
“Let all who are hungry come in” they would say
But now the new message was just “Stay away!”
It seemed that this Pesach was doomed to pass over
With nary a seder for Elijah to discover.
But there suddenly came, like the Golem of Prague
A rescuer seen through the cloud and the fog!
And now every house with mezuzah and modem
Can find the  Zoom programs and quickly download ‘em.
Sign up it’s free, it is here to alert you all
You can have a big seder if you just make it virtual.
We can gather from far as the guests of the Zoom
And the bombers are stuck out in the Waiting Room.
We can still sing Dayenu in a great chorus
And the part after dinner lasts forever to bore us.
We can roam the wide world while we sit on our kiester.
Now that Zoom has saved Pesach, let them take care of Easter.


haggadah Section: Introduction
Source: Marilyn Halpern