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4 Children
Contributed by Adele Decent

  • TOP HAGGADAHS FOR 2023
  1. The wise child asks details about the specific meaning of the laws of Passover observance: “What are the testimonies, the statutes, and laws which  Adonai  our G-d has commanded you?” to which we respond with one of the very specific laws of the Passover seder. 
      
  2. The wicked child asks, “Whatever does this mean to you?” The authors admonish this child as one who is not concerned about the laws personally, but only for others. This exchange reminds us of the importance of not separating ourselves from our community or from traditions that might seem uncomfortable or foreign to us, but rather to engage with them in ways that enable us to connect with our community. 
     
  3. The simple child asks, “What does this mean?” to which a straightforward summary of the story is given, directly from the Torah: “It was with a mighty hand that God brought us out from Egypt, the house of bondage.” (Ex 13:14). 
      
  4. In response to the child who does not know how to ask, we are instructed to “open it up” and explain, “It is because of what G-d did for me when I went free from Egypt” (Ex 13:8).

Reciting The Four Children reminds us of the Jewish obligation to teach the next generation about this powerful story. We should invite our children to be a part of the conversation, strive to meet the children where they are individually, respect the way each one learns and interacts in the world, and respond accordingly and appropriately.

Through the different kinds of children and their questions (or lack thereof), we get a sense of different kinds of people as individuals and learners. There are those who are interested and find meaning in all the details and specific rules of Passover – and perhaps, too, of life in general. Others don’t connect to these rituals, while some want to understand the basics, and still others who might be overwhelmed or not interested enough to participate.

There are pieces of each of The Four Children in all of us. In specific situations, we might feel more wise, wicked, simple, or not know how to ask and in these scenarios, the dominant characteristic may influence how we think or behave. The Four Children remind us that all of these attributes are legitimate and valid, and it is our responsibility to respond in ways that are most appropriate at a given time – helping our children, our community, the next generation, and ourselves.
haggadah Section: -- Four Children

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