So wait. First, Pfizer discovered its extra doses in each vial right around Chanukah, and then, the giant cargo ship was freed from captivity in Egypt in the middle of Passover? Who put my Hebrew school teachers in charge of writing the plot all of a sudden?

— Mike Madden (@MikeMadden) March 29, 2021

WHAT NO SEDER PLATE TONIGHT???

That's right, this Seder has no order.  

This has been a CRAZY year so let's have a FUN CRAZY SEDER.

INT. COMEDY CLUB - NIGHT

JERRY SEINFELD

Do you know why they call it Passover? G-d told Moses that the Israelites should mark their doorposts with lamb’s blood. So that He could “pass over” their houses. And spare them from the plague of the killing of the first born.

My question is: Who was put in charge of telling everyone? That’s a big job. There’s a lot counting on that job. What if someone isn’t home? How did they tell them? Did they leave a note? Probably not. The Egyptians could see it. Would have ruined the whole plan. Did they just take the liberty of putting lamb’s blood on the door? What about when that family gets home, sees blood all over their door? “Honey, do you see this? Someone put blood on our door. Someone’s out to get us! You better get off the couch and wipe this off.” “I’m busy! Have our first born do it!”

adapted from The Yada Yada Haggadah - https://www.amazon.com/dp/1793219109

FOUR CUPS OF WINE

But who’s counting, have one or four or six…

How wonderful it is to live in a world in which fruit on the vine can turn into wine.

How wonderful it is to live in a world where we can be together on ZOOM tonight from all over the world.

Raise your glass

בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה ה׳ אֱלֹהֵינוּ מֶלֶךְ הָעוֹלָם בּוֹרֵא פְּרִי הַגָּפֶן

 Baruch ata Adonai, Eloheinu melech ha-olam, borei p’ri hagafen.

Blessed are You, Adonai , source of life, Creator of the fruit of the vine.

OR just take out the Purel.

As we wash our hands
We pray,
Blessed is the Soul of the Universe,
Breathing us in and breathing us out.
May our breaths continue
And our health and the health of all
Be preserved
In this time of sickness and fear of sickness.
Holy Wholeness,
We take as much responsibility for this as we can
By observing the obligation to wash our hands
Thoroughly:
For as long as it takes to say this prayer.
Amen

בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה הָ׳ אֱלֹהֵינוּ מֶלֶךְ הָעוֹלָם אֲשֶׁר קִדְּשָׁנוּ בְּמִצְוֹתָיו וְצִוָּנוּ עַל נְטִילַת יָדַיִם

Let’s dip our celery or any other veggie dipped in salt water to remember that this has been a year of may tears and fears.

The Four Questions…

Did you get your vaccine?

You did.. WHERE did you get it?

Did you get the Phizer, Moderna or Johnson & Johnson?

Did you have any side affects?

Enjoy your next glass of wine while watching this video.

With our guests around the table, Passover offers us a perfect place to raise awareness of today's social injustices. For our Seders, the food choices we make matter. The inclusion of contemporary symbols will teach others.

Try a new kind of Social Justice Seder this year and spark conversation about how we will all work to make the world a safer and more liberated place now.

Here’s one example of a Social Justice haggadah: https://www.haggadot.com/haggadah/haggadah-justice

Charoset ice cream exists.  Ben & Jerry’s makes a Kosher for Passover Charoset ice cream flavor that’s only sold in Israel. 

The Ashkenazi charoset flavor is described as "vanilla-based with apples, cinnamon, and lots of walnuts."

Would you try charoset ice cream?

Pre-Covid, the world’s largest Seder each year was held in Kathmandu, Nepal, with over 1,000 attendees annually!

Makes your Seder look small now doesn’t it.  Imagine your Bubbe cooking for those people!  Oy the shmaltz she’d need!!

When we gathered over zoom in 5780/ 2020 with our families and communities, most people thought that it was an anomaloy; that by the next year Passover could be "normal" once again. While we are grateful for vaccines, it is clear that there is no "normal" to return to. Things remain altered; we are changed.

The pandemic reminds me of the Exodus narrative itself. The telling of the story at our seder usually ends as the Israelites cross the sea and begin wandering in the desert. To me, however, the wandering is everything. While the early taste of freedom is met with sweetness and song, the feeling didn't last. Some Israelites long to return to Egypt because even to live enslaved seems preferable sometimes than to live with uncertainty. The people often forget to be grateful for their freedom and kvetch (complain) about their conditions and situation. Moses, their leader, quickly learns he needs help to lead. He builds a team and with that team  the  people figure out how to be  a  people. It can't happen overnight. It takes many many years of wandering.

Here we are together -- online. We are not newly in this landscape, we have been wandering in it for a while. Like all who wander, we are not sure exactly where we're going or how we will get there. We feel uncertain. Like the Israelites, we may long to "go back" to how things used to be, even though, when we really think about it, things weren't all that great for many of us. It is hard to live with uncertainty. It can be hard to remember to stay grateful for the things that can bring us together -- digital technologies, creative programming, and more. Leaders are emerging during this time but the best among them are realizing that to lead is to make sure no one is left behind. We need a team. We need each other. 

This new desert, this wandering, is our opportunity to come together as Jews and as thriving, vibrant, beautiful communities. I, for one, do not wish to "go back." Of course I am glad for a return to some pre-pandemic realities like being able to gather, to hug, to do some of the activities I miss. But there is no "going back," there is only forging ahead. Out of this desert wandering I long for a brighter future in which no one is left behind. I long for a future built on meaningful commitments to diversity and equity. I long for a future in which we work for a future by resolving to protect our planet. I long for a future in which our Jewish communities grow stronger by becoming more inclusive and celebratory of the ways in which our differences make us better, rather than letting difference divide us. Finally, I wish for us that however we make our way through this desert, we rememeber that we need each other and we act accordingly long into the future. 

This has been a hard time but I remain hopeful and grateful. May we celebrate the freedoms we enjoy and may we resolve to keep fighting for greater freedom for all.